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I Couldn't Do That!

I Couldn’t Do That!

Hospice staff and volunteers hear the exclamation “I couldn’t do that!” nearly every time they tell someone what they do.

In the past, community members supported each other through illness and all the needs associated with declining health. In these busy, more modern days, dying has become a more impersonal process often with only medical personnel and immediate family involved. We’ve gotten out of the habit of caring for one another on a personal basis. This is the gift of hospice care; hospice brings community support back to individuals and the families facing life-limiting illness. Hospice patient care volunteers who so willingly give their time and energy are key to this process.

Hospice patient care volunteers provide the perfect compromise between families too close to the situation and hospice healthcare staff whose caring focus can be specific to the disease process. A patient care volunteer provides a friend’s ear for patients and families to confide in and share their feelings and concerns. They also provide a very practical resource to families by relieving caregivers and running errands.

“Friends often say ‘good for you, I couldn’t do it’ when they hear I’m a hospice volunteer,” says Jim Ernst, Yolo Hospice Patient Care Volunteer. “I couldn’t not do it. It is about being there in a time of great stress for someone else, but, for me, it is about connecting with people in a meaningful way.”

Whatever it is that draws a volunteer to hospice, it is a sense of making a difference that makes the work so personally gratifying. We hear it time and again from our volunteers “for everything I give, I get so much in return.” The rewards most mentioned include:

• Making a difference in someone's life
• Gaining greater self-knowledge
• Acting on your values and ideal to support someone else
• Experiencing personal spiritual growth
• Belonging to a team working together

“You are part of a team,” says Marion Franck, Yolo Hospice Patient Care Volunteer. “I never lack someone to call when something is making me uncomfortable. I talk to the nurse, the social worker or the volunteer services manager, but the other volunteers are also my advisers. They have good ideas.”

Yolo Hospice provides in-depth training for all prospective volunteers. No one is asked to do this kind of work unprepared. For those drawn to patient care, but nervous about what it might mean, the breadth of the patient care training is sure to help you decide if hospice volunteering is right for you.

One thing volunteers learn when they come to Yolo Hospice is that hospice is about life. Yolo Hospice helps people live well in the time they have remaining to them. That is the emphasis for the volunteers too. A patient may wish to talk about death or cataloging photos for the family, but often patients and volunteers are matched up because they have something in common such as enjoying taking a walk, making crafts or reading. Patients are encouraged to participate in these activities as long as they can. It’s often the volunteers that help them.

What people don’t usually ask or say is ‘how do you deal with the grief’? While this journey is unique to each individual, Yolo Hospice provides volunteers with information and the tools to help them through the grieving process. Yolo Hospice volunteers also meet in a support group once a month where they remember and honor the patients they’ve lost, and share their lessons and stories. 

“Volunteering for an expected death may allow you to prepare for other deaths in ways you don’t realize,” says Franck.

The bottom line for patient care volunteers is that their work is immediate and consequential. They make a real difference in the lives of patients and families.  For a number of reasons, not everyone wants to be directly involved with patients, but are committed to helping us care for them. Those volunteers help us in other ways, such as helping with fundraising events or in the thrift shop. Everyone at Yolo Hospice recognizes that it is an honor and privilege to be invited into the last months, weeks and days of a person's life.

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